Bad Behaviour?

Since the beginning of the year I've really felt like I've "settled in" to parenting.  I have a break from Oscar on my working days and Ant works hard to ensure I get lie ins wherever possible as I do the night shifts.  I was starting to really enjoy my time alone with Oscar, especially as the weather improved and we could get out more.  Now he's a little bit older he can engage more with play and activities, his attention span is a little longer, he can entertain himself reasonably well for short periods and his communication is coming along, all of which made it easier spending long periods of time alone with him.

However, in the last month (since I stopped breastfeeding) I've really noticed a shift in my mood, his behaviour and how I'm finding parenting.  He seems to be a little more aggressive (sometimes because he's tired or overexcited) and more demanding - now he can ask for what he wants it frustrates him when he doesn't get it.  Here are a few examples of his current behaviour:

• He asks for Baby Shark, I let him listen to it a couple of times then tell him that's enough and it's going away.  He gets very upset/angry and tantrums for a short while then repeatedly asks again/tries to get my phone to get me to put it on.  He then asks continuously throughout the day, each time with a meltdown when I say no.
• We went to a fair and let him go on a ride.  He spent the following hour asking to go on the same ride again, could not be distracted by anything else and every time we put him down to have a run around he ran straight back in that direction, even from the opposite side of the fair.
• He throws his food, sometimes even the food he wants to eat.  We have a place on the table for him to put food that he doesn't want, so he doesn't have to keep it on his tray, and this did work well for a while.  However, now he's just gone back to chucking it on the floor and then either saying "gone" or pointing at the table where he should put it.
• He throws EVERYTHING.  If you tell him he can't play with something and try to take it off him, he throws it, usually hitting me and hurting me!  If he's done with something, he throws it.  It's excessive.
• When he gets angry or overexcited he gets aggressive - he tries to smack, grabs/pinches your face, head butts.  He's pretty good at using gentle hands when he's reminded though and is more likely to head bang against an inanimate object than hurt someone else.

Now, most of these things are within the realm of "normal toddler behaviour" and he's by no means a majorly difficult child.  However, when I'm tired and in pain it all gets a lot harder.  If I'm struggling in a morning I let him have the TV on more, which inevitably leads to him being more difficult in the afternoon.  He's struggling with worsening reflux, teething and going through a developmental leap at the moment so I'm not entirely surprised by any of his behaviour and I'm sure it's just a phase but I'm finding it hard.  I think part of it is that he relied quite heavily on breastfeeding to calm himself down and he's yet to learn other ways of doing so, especially as he isn't keen on cuddles.

What's worse is that I know I'm part of the problem.  I can be inconsistent with behaviour management and sometimes I overreact.  Suffering from chronic pain makes me overly sensitive to acute pain so if he throws something at me or scratches me or whatever I tend to yelp or shout, not at him but in pain.  He then gets really upset and it's hard to address the issue because he's so upset.  I'm hoping this is all a hormonal thing from stopping breastfeeding and it will balance out once I can get myself back on the pill.  I'm also considering whether it could be related to the fact that I've put dairy back into my diet, maybe I have somewhat of a dairy intolerance too?  If sorting my hormones out doesn't help then that will be my next port of call.

Here's hoping things settle down again soon!