Wednesday, 31 August 2016

End of my tether...

I just had the phone call from Guy's.  They aren't happy doing the egg collection on Friday and as they don't do it at weekends we have to wait until Monday.  My ovaries may explode before then - I feel huge already.

This means I need to go back to work for the next 2 days and book off Monday and Tuesday the following week.  I was hoping to have the weekend to recover as well but it's not to be as it'll be the beginning of the week and I'll be back at work on Wednesday.

The real kicked in this situation is that, for the third time out of 4 appointments in the last fortnight, our usual PGD nurse was not there today.  Another nurse did my scan and told me that if I wasn't listed for egg collection on Friday it would be Saturday (the Assisted Conception Unit in Sheffield works 6 days a week).  As Guy's do not work 6 days a week it will be Monday and we now only have enough medication to keep us going until Saturday.

Saturday night will be the trigger shot so that's the last injection and I have enough Gonal F for tonight, tomorrow and Friday.  I however only have enough Cetrotide for tomorrow and Friday morning and I will need one on Saturday morning.  This means that this afternoon I have to do the 100 mile round trip to Sheffield AGAIN to pick up a prescription due to their oversight.  ALS is currently on the phone to them trying to get them to send the prescription over to Derby so I can pick it up locally but they're not keen...  so much for not putting yourself through any stress.

We will just have to wait and see!



UPDATE 1.9.16

Fortunately a very kind consultant in Derby, whom I work for, sorted out my prescription for me so we did not have to go to Sheffield.  I could have hugged him!

Fingers Crossed!

Looking at my scan this morning I might be ready - I have one follicle that's made its way up to 21mm and a good few others in the late teens.  We just have to wait for Guy's to ring us and confirm.

I'm absolutely shattered today.  I couldn't sleep last night because it was so warm and I kept needing to get up to pee (silly large ovaries taking up my bladder space).  I came home from Sheffield and went straight back to bed for a couple of hours and I'm now trying to drag myself up to make some lunch.

Wish me luck - with the eggs, not lunch!

Tuesday, 30 August 2016

Still Not Ready!

I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty fed up today.

I went for my scan and bloods this morning and our normal nurse wasn't working today so we saw another lady.  She was quite impersonal and didn't speak to me the whole time she had a camera stuck up my lady parts.  Unfortunately my follicles were all around 14-16mm (they need to be 16-20mm) so they're still not quite ready.  It took 2 attempts to get my blood due to the nurse insisting on using butterfly needles, despite me saying a normal needle was more than fine.  We were told that I could not trigger today and would possibly need to go back for another scan tomorrow morning.  They were going to email Guy's Hospital in London and ask whether they wanted another scan doing or if they would just be happy for me to trigger tomorrow night.  So we were sent home with another prescription for a few more days of injections (just in case) and told to ring at 14:30 to find out if I needed a further scan.

ALS rang them and by 15:00 he'd still had no answer.  When he finally got through they said they had not heard back from Guy's so would let us know when they did.  Come 16:00 we'd still heard nothing and I rang them again at this point as I needed to let my manager know if I'd be in late tomorrow.  No answer again.  Finally around 16:20 they rang ALS back to say I'd need another scan tomorrow.

I had planned to have Thursday and Friday off on annual leave for London but as that's now not happening until at least 24 hours later I can still work Thursday.  So I've put tomorrow in to save rushing back from Sheffield AGAIN and Friday for hopefully egg collection to be done.

The IVF process itself is not stressing me out at all.  I know that it's a long process, I know that it's unpredictable and I know that it will all be worth it in the end.  However, trying to fit it around work is horrendous.  I hate letting people down or leaving them short staffed, especially at such short notice and it just feels like I'm messing them around.  Fortunately my manager has been really good about the whole situation, otherwise I really don't think I'd have coped at all - certainly in my last job I wouldn't have been able to go to so many appointments in such a short space of time.

I really can't reiterate enough that if you have the ability to take a week or two off whilst you're coming up to egg collection (and transfer, I imagine) then do so.  The medications make you feel pretty naff and really tired as it is, let alone when you're getting up at 05:30 to do a 100 mile round trip for a scan and blood tests, followed by a full day at work (finishing late because you started late) and then getting home and ready to do it all again the next day.  I haven't lifted a finger in terms of housework in the last fortnight.  I'm pretty much coming home from work, having dinner and a bath and going straight to bed.  Due to my EDS, I imagine I'm being hit harder with fatigue than a healthy person would but it's been pretty debilitating.

Anyway, I don't want to moan too much but I also want people to understand the reality of it.  The injections themselves are insignificant compared to the enormity of the whole process and honestly they've been no trouble at all in the grand scheme of things.  We have had some friends visit from New Zealand this evening, whilst visiting their family in the UK so that was lovely - they appreciated our situation and were happy to just come over and chill rather than going out (I even greeted them in my PJs).

Hopefully I'll have better news tomorrow - or at least I won't be so tired as I can go back to bed when we get home from Sheffield!

Sunday, 28 August 2016

Busy busy busy!

I have no idea where the last 2 days have gone!  Not much to tell on the IVF front, still feeling bloated and painy but not too bad.  Managed to do my Cetrotide all by myself a couple of times too which I'm pretty proud of.

I did have a panic earlier thinking I might have OHSS (Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome) which can be caused by the injections.  I was having a lot of pain in my ovaries, feeling really nauseous, hot and sweaty, faint and just generally not well but I'd not eaten much or had much water all day and I felt a lot better after some food and fresh air.

The reason for having not eaten much is that we've been at a powerlifting competition all day.  I couldn't compete due to the treatment at the moment but ALS was competing along with 4 other friends of ours and I was supporting - I made brownies, filmed all their lifts and screamed my lungs out at them.  It was lovely playing mother for the day and I'm so proud of them all.

Fortunately I'll get to compete alongside them all at the World Championships in October once this treatment cycle is done and before we do our FET (Frozen Embryo Transfer).  It'll be my last competition for a year or two so I want to go out on a high - can't wait to get back to training.

Now I need a lie down...

Friday, 26 August 2016

Not quite ready...

It seemed to take forever but Friday finally arrived!

We were up at 05:30 so we had time to get ready, administer the Cetrotide at 06:00 and leave the house for Sheffield by 06:15.  It was a really miserable morning weather wise but I was feeling positive because it's payday today AND a refund I was waiting for from eBay finally made its way to me this morning.

We were first seen in the clinic at 08:00 and our usual nurse was back today.  She asked how I'd been doing and invited ALS into the scan room with me (the nurse that called me in last week hadn't mentioned whether he could be there or not so he waited outside).  She checked both my ovaries and the follicles were growing nicely.  When she showed me the screen, even though I'm no expert, I could clearly see the difference from the baseline scan done last week - there were lots of round black patches inside the ovary, which are the follicles.  On the baseline scan the follicles are so small they're hard to spot without being pointed out to you but today everything was really clear and definitely a lot larger.  On a side note, the scan was considerably more uncomfortable than previous because everything is so bloated and achy anyway.  I nearly hit the roof when she put pressure on my left ovary but it was over pretty quickly. 

After a good look, the nurse measured the follicles and unfortunately we're not ready for collection yet as they still have some growing to do.  I thought I'd be disappointed with this scenario but honestly I'm not at all.  I'm just really happy that they're growing well and it's perfectly normal for the cycle to take longer than a week to get them to full size (16-20mm).  

So what now?  Well, we go back to the injections for the next few days and go back to Sheffield for a scan on Tuesday morning, at which time they estimate I'll be ready to go.  We got a nice surprise when we went to pick up some more medication from the pharmacy as we didn't have to pay for it - you only pay for the initial treatment in the cycle and the top ups are included.  We both walked out of the clinic smiling and by the time I got to work around 10:00 the sun was shining and it was a beautiful day - a bit of a change from the miserable start.

All in all I'm feeling pretty good today.  If we'd been ready to retrieve today we would have ended up doing the trigger shot over the weekend and having egg collection in London early next week.  That would then mean I'd have to go to work for the rest of the week.  If I'm ready on Tuesday (which I'm keeping everything crossed for) it will mean doing the trigger shot Tuesday night, heading to London Wednesday night ready for egg collection Thursday morning and then coming home on Friday.  That way I'll end up with the weekend to recover a bit more before I go back to work, which would be preferable to going back 48 hours post surgery. 

Side effects wise I'm getting really bloated (my weight has been steady but between yesterday morning and this morning I've gained 1.5kg) and living in dresses because trousers or any sort of tight waistband is just too uncomfortable.  I've had a lot more pain today, spreading all around my back and down my legs, but I'm hoping that is just because my ovaries were prodded and poked this morning and it will ease off tomorrow.  The nurse did say the pain I've been having until now is perfectly normal because, in a natural menstrual cycle, you grow 1 follicle and I'm currently growing around 14-15 so naturally it's going to be uncomfortable.

The Cetrotide is still causing local irritation for a couple of hours after the injection but it's really not too bad.  I'm going to try and do this one myself tomorrow morning - I've not plucked up the courage yet as the needle is quite a bit longer than the Gonal F but I've been fine with them for the last couple of days so I'm hoping I'll be able to just get it done in the morning.

I'd love to hear any of your stories and experiences with IVF - whether you've used the same process and medications as us or something completely different.  Also, feel free to comment with any questions and I'll try to answer them as honestly as I can.  I've found it quite hard to get information during the process (especially with regard to the PGD side of things) so I'm putting this blog out there to help others in my situation and want to be as forthcoming as possible.

Thursday, 25 August 2016

Work, work, work, work, work!

I hate that damn Rihanna song but it seemed to fit with the theme of today's post so I used it for my title!

Today is day 7 of the stimulation cycle (day 7 of Gonal F injections, day 2 of Cetrotide injections) and I'm really starting to feel something.  I get twinges in both sides of my groin when I bend up and down now, around where my ovaries are.  Increasingly often when I take a step and put my foot down on the floor I get a twinge and I'm even started to get a dull aching around that area some of the time I'm at rest.  Hopefully this means things are happening and my left ovary is starting to catch up with my right - it's so odd not actually knowing what's going on and just guessing from how I feel.

Work was really challenging today.  The Cetrotide injection seems to make me feel nauseous for a couple of hours and, despite going to bed at 8:30pm last night, I'm getting tireder by the day.  Fortunately my team leader is aware of the situation and has been keeping an eye on me and forbidden me from doing anything that requires too much movement. I'm fortunate enough to work in a hospital (and in the maternity/gynaecology department) so people tend to appreciate what I'm going through quite easily.  Not to mention the process I'm going through helps me understand the terminology and such that comes along with the job - so we've fitted well together.

ALS was at work last night but he's now off for 8 days whilst he helps look after me around "my surgery" (his work are not aware of what's actually happening).  He works on a casual contract so has the option to turn down shifts when something important comes along BUT unfortunately they can't cover shifts at short notice so he's had to keep the whole next week free ready for when we're heading to London.  It's great that he's off because he can drive me to work and keep on top of the housework but it definitely sucks that I'm the one going through the physical side of things and I'm only going to get the 2 days we're in London off work.  I have really little annual leave left to take until April due to our honeymoon earlier in the year and earlier appointments (my previous department wouldn't let me make hours up so I ended up using half a day's leave for every appointment in Sheffield).  Whilst work are being really understanding I really can't afford to take more than those 2 days off so that I have days left to take for egg transfer - fingers crossed we get that far!

I'll just have to deal with it.  My alarm is going off which means it's Gonal F time so, in the words of Tigger, "TTFN"!

Wednesday, 24 August 2016

Ouchie!

Today marked the start of the Cetrotide injections.  I'd read so many horror stories about these, seen that the needle was twice the length of the Gonal F one and been told they really hurt so I was pretty worked up about them- unnecessarily I might add.

6am rolled around and we headed downstairs, mixed the medication and got ready.  There was a lot less wincing and telling ALS to wait than there was with the first Gonal F and I mostly just let him get on with it.  It really didn't hurt much and I immediately relaxed as soon as it was through the skin.  Unfortunately thanks to the relief everything started to go fuzzy and I spent the rest of the injection saying, "Hurry up, I'm going to faint".  I managed to hold out to the end, lay down on the floor for a few minutes and felt okay, just a bit nauseous.  After the injection the site went red (about the size of my palm around where the needle went in) and incredibly itchy for about 2 hours.  Fortunately it calmed down after that.

14 hours later and it's a little sore and it has bruised but nothing too bad.  I've just done my Gonal F injection in the other side which hurt a little more than normal but I'm putting it down to my stomach being generally sore from all the injections.

Side effect wise I'm pretty much the same although I get a pain in my right ovary area every time I bend or take too big a stride.  On the scan my right ovary was shown to be the dominant one so hopefully this just means it's growing some big, healthy follicles!

I walked home from work and then went out for another walk around the local park later on and it's exhausted me.  It's definitely taking a toll on my body and I would love to be able to take a couple of weeks off work to just let my body do the work and not have to worry about anything else but unfortunately that's not an option.

It feels really odd to know that it's been nearly a week now and I have no idea, other than how my body is feeling, whether the injections are doing anything (or more importantly whether they're doing what they're meant to do).  Roll on Friday morning when we get to find out what's going on down there!

Tuesday, 23 August 2016

Nearly halfway?

Today was day 5 of the Gonal F injections so, if my ovaries are playing ball, this could be about halfway to egg collection.  I'm starting to get a little nervous for the scan on Friday in case nothing is happening, but I can definitely feel something going on down there.

My stomach has been really gassy all day today and I've had to go to the toilet quite a few times as well, which is irritating.  I'm assuming this is injection related and it certainly doesn't feel like a bug as I'm okay in myself.

The other side effect I forgot to mention yesterday is spots - I'm breaking out like a teenager!  I had really bad acne in my early teens and even now my skin isn't great, but it's been a long time since it was this bad.  It's a small price to pay though.

I really thought I'd be missing the gym by now but, to be honest, I'm quite glad that I'm on orders to rest and take it easy because I'm absolutely drained and really don't feel like training.  I'm getting plenty of gentle exercise in by going walking (the new Pokemon Go game is really helping with the motivation for this) every day.  If ALS is working I have to walk either to or from work anyway so even on days where I really don't feel like it, at least I'm getting a bit of exercise.

I'm going to try and get an early night in tonight as we've got to be up extra early tomorrow to start the Cetrotide injections - wish me luck!

Monday, 22 August 2016

Hello, Side Effects.

Today is day 4 of my Gonal F injections and the side effects are starting to kick in.  I'm not sure what's actually side effects and what is unrelated (or related to my EDS instead) but here's what's going on at the moment:

Tiredness 
Waking up this morning was unbelievably hard.  I had to physically force my eyes to stay open.  It's been a long time since I've felt so soul destroyingly tired!  This is made so much worse by the fact that I've given up caffeine for the purpose of increasing my fertility.  I'm not a caffeine addict but I am partial to a little boost on days when I'm feeling really tired.  Trying to fight through without a pick me up was hard this morning but some Lucozade and lots of water seemed to do the trick by about 11:30am.

Cramps
These are still real mild (less painful than my normal menstrual cramps) but I have had some definite cramps in my lower abdomen/groin area throughout the day today.

Bloating
I feel really bloated and gassy - honestly, I've spent most of the day trying not to break wind in the office!  I expected the bloating but not in that way.

Sciatica
I was off my feet for a little while in June with sciatica and it seems to have come back with a vengeance over the last couple of days.  I'm not sure if this is related at all but either way it's something I could do without.

All in all the side effects are mild and really not too troublesome at the moment, so hopefully that's the way they stay.

On a side note, for no apparent reason today's injection really hurt - I got ALS to do it for me as, although I'm happy to do it myself, it's a bit of an awkward angle.  For some reason though, it stung more going in, it hurt when he injected the liquid and it even hurt coming out.  ALS is putting it down to him trying to do it on the left side of my stomach with his right hand so it was an odd angle for him too - maybe I'll just stick to doing it myself from now on.  He was very apologetic though and it was still far from unbearable!

We had a little look at the injections that start Wednesday morning (we have to mix the medication for these) and they look pretty complicated.  Unfortunately to get them at the same time every day they're going to have to be done at 6am (as we have to leave the house at 6:15am on Friday to get to our appointment in Sheffield for 8am).  So on Wednesday I'm going to have to get up an hour earlier than normal just to jab myself... not my idea of a good start to the day!  But it will all be worth it :)

Sunday, 21 August 2016

It's finally happening!

After a lovely 2 week honeymoon in July, we have finally, officially started our IVF journey.

We had an appointment booked to hopefully get us started on the injections on 19th August.  At this appointment I needed to be on my period and was told to stop my pills on 14th August.  I'd had to double up packets as you have to be on them for 21 days before you stop and if I'd had my week off as I normally would, I'd have only had 14 days on the pills before I came off them.

As you can imagine, after 6-7 weeks with no period I was starting to feel pretty bloated and had incredibly sore boobs so I was pretty glad to see the back of the pills on Sunday.  However, I do tend to have to be off them for 4-5 days before my period shows up.  At 3am Friday morning (just 5 hours before our appointment) I woke up and still no sign.  Needless to say I was pretty frustrated as I wouldn't be able to start the injections and would probably have to travel back to Sheffield the following day.

Fortunately about 5:30am it finally showed up and at 6:15am we headed off to Sheffield for our appointment.

The Appointment:

We were told that I'd need a scan and blood tests, which are always done at a Friday morning clinic and this clinic is first come, first served.  Clinic starts at 8am but as I really needed to get back to work as soon as possible we arrived around 7:30am to ensure we were first seen.

Our usual nurse was on annual leave so another woman took my bloods (which was painless at the time but has bruised pretty badly and is now rather sore).  She asked me if I was bleeding and when I said it had only been for about 3 hours she told me it was probably too soon to start the treatment today and I'd most likely have to come back tomorrow - not what I wanted to hear, especially as it's a 100 mile round trip!  Then I was taken into another room for an internal scan and I cannot praise the nurse enough.  She took the time explaining what I could see on the screen and really put me at ease. My womb lining was thin and ovaries suppressed (as they should be after taking the pill) and because I've been on the pill for a good few years, although I'd only just started my period, my lining was thin enough to be able to start the treatment.

I was given the prescription for the next week's worth of medications and told to ring between 2-3pm to check that everything was okay with my bloods and to confirm the dose.  Then we were sent off to the pharmacy and back on our way home.

Just a note for anyone having IVF on the NHS, you do have to pay for the prescriptions - our total was about £25 as there were 3 different medications.

To be honest I was a little disappointed with this appointment as we were given no recap on how to do the injections and everything seemed very rushed.  Fortunately all the medications come with detailed instructions so we've managed to follow these - but it would have been easier to see it again as it's over 2 months since we were shown!

Starting Treatment:

As I'd gone back to work, ALS rang the clinic in the afternoon and they gave me the go ahead to start the Gonal F injections that evening.  These have to be done at the same time every evening and we've chosen 7:30pm as it fits around all our other commitments.

The first one was pretty nerve wracking and ALS did it for me.  The Gonal F comes in a really handy pen device so you just have to screw the needle onto the end, insert it into the skin and then press a button on the top.  Surprisingly it was pretty painless.  I've read on other blogs that it hurts less if you take the medication out of the fridge about 30 minutes before you inject it so this is what we did.

Yesterday I did the second injection by myself with ALS there for support.  I'd got to learn to do it myself as tonight he's at work so I had no choice to do it alone.  Both nights have been fine and I'm pleasantly surprised how easily I'm managing.

So far I haven't had any side effects other than a little bloating and really mild pain, but that could be just down to my period anyway.

On Wednesday morning we add in a second injection!  I'll try to keep you up to date with what's going on.