Hypochondriac!

After last week's episode I got myself off to the doctor's on Wednesday and they booked me in for a spireometry test on Thursday to check if I have asthma and was told that I'd only need an appointment if there was anything wrong with the results.

I rang the doctor's this morning having not heard anything and they said they'd got a note on my file to make me an appointment so I booked in for this afternoon and spent the day worrying.  When I finally got to see the doctor he told me, in no uncertain terms, that I'm fine.  He said they'd ruled out emphysema, bronchitis, COPD etc. (I'm pretty sure I'd be in a FAR worse state if I had any of those) and that I just had a bit of an occasional wheeze and to keep taking my inhaler as needed.  He then insinuated that they were panic attacks (and is the third person to do so).  I appreciate they have to cover all bases but I know they aren't panic attacks seeing as they have happened at times when I'm very chilled out and not worrying about anything.  I don't feel panicked at the time and so far they've only happened when relaxing.  I was so frustrated I didn't even ask about asthma.

I'm beginning to wonder if maybe it is all in my head and I imagine all these symptoms and I'm actually fine.  I know this isn't the case having spent hours in A&E on oxygen and steroids etc. but it just feels like I never seem to get anything that can be easily tested for.  When I was waiting to be diagnosed with the fibromyalgia a lot of people (medical and otherwise) implied it was all in my head or that it was a mental problem and even to this day there are still people who are convinced I'm just whining about nothing.  Even doctors question who diagnosed me, when, how... it just makes me feel like a fraud.

Don't get me wrong, it's great news hearing that it's nothing serious and that I'm 'fine', I just wish I actually felt it...