Oh my goodness, we have a 3 year old! He has had a lovely birthday, minus a horrible incident outside Smyths where he fell down the kerb, bumped his head and I managed to stand on his hand. Low-key celebrations suits him and being stuck at home with us all day has played to his strengths. We went to Smyths to spend his money from Grampy, had McDonald's for lunch, we ate cake, he opened presents, Nana and Papa came to drop off gifts and stood on the garden to talk to him for a bit and that's it. He has been struggling lately with seeming bored, miserable and just generally not wanting to do anything so we figured new toys might help and today he was a dream. He has been the happiest we've seen him in ages, not overwhelmed and the TV barely made it on at all!
So, what does 3 look like for Oscar? Well, we get varying readings because he can't stand still on the scales but he's somewhere between 12.6 and 12.9 kg and we bought a chart for his wall which measures him at 91 cm. We've just started to put him in 2-3 year clothes but he will mostly have to stay in 18-24 month trousers as the 2-3 year ones are way too long. He's in a 5.5 shoe from when we last had his feet measured in July, his wellies are a 6 and seem big (but they don't do half sizes). We are about to enter another lockdown so won't be able to get his feet measured again for a while but he mostly wears his wellies anyway and it is the season for it.
Development
Development has come on a lot in some areas, a little less in others but every day with him is something new and I honestly wish I could capture every little thing he says and does.
Speech
Well he doesn't shut up... honestly I think his language skills have jumped well above average now. He has a comment on everything, has a question about everything and loves to talk to anyone and everything. He often talks beyond his years - yesterday I explained about birthday presents and that people bought them for him and he responded with "oh that's very nice of them". He has us in hysterics all the time and, whilst we don't understand every word, we get most of what he's saying with context. Just today he has started expressing that he is sad - he'd had a haircut for the first time and was overwhelmed, when we got home he was very disregulated and then threw a load of stuff off the table, saying "I knocked it off because I am sad". He had a video call with SALT today for an evaluation and she was definitely happy with his actual language and speech, which I expected. Social interaction will be the interesting one to discuss when she has a video call with him at nursery on Friday. He does a lot of "scripting" where he randomly quotes books or TV shows completely out of context and he can have quite a bit of repetition in that context but generally his speech is pretty good.
Gross Motor
He can run now and runs everywhere although he does still fall quite a lot. He did jump with both feet for a while but now jumps almost one at a time, especially when he's excited. He does this little skipping type jump on the spot which is adorable but also makes him look like a little goblin. He's really never got the hang of the balance bike and isn't interested in it but apparently he does like a trike at nursery, although I don't know how he propels it. He is starting to get better at climbing according to nursery and definitely climbs more around the house, getting on to kitchen chairs and the like, but we haven't been able to take him to anywhere like soft play for a good while so it's hard to tell.
Fine Motor
He is quite competent in this regard but also really reluctant. He doesn't enjoy mark making as he can't make it look like whatever he is trying to achieve so he gets frustrated. He can put puzzle pieces together but it often takes him a while and he can use a knife and fork but generally eats with his hands. I've noticed park of the issue is that he tends to keep a "special object" (which can be whatever he is attached to on a given day) and he prefers to hold that in his right hand. We are pretty sure he is right-handed and he is definitely more competent with his right but because of his insistence on holding an object he ends up using his left hand which he isn't so skilled with and then gets frustrated that he can't do things. If we suggest he switches the object to the other hand he refuses. We are working on all of these skills though and he is improving slowly but surely.
Self-Care
Again, he can but whether he will is a different matter. He is capable of getting his pants and trousers on by himself and is starting to be able to do his socks. He can do his jacket but has only done it once and refused ever since. He can do his shoes and get them fastened without help now though which is great. He is getting quite good at cleaning his hands and face although is more reluctant with his face. He's usually pretty good with having his teeth brushed too. He's reasonably good at tidying up after himself and loves helping me to clean, although usually takes over, steals my cleaning supplies and refuses to let me finish. He's fully potty trained and only has the very occasional accident if he's really distracted by something. He can generally hold it if we aren't near a toilet too.
Social/Emotional
This is a difficult subject at the moment. He definitely has difficulties with social/emotional development and the Community Paediatrician is unsure whether that's a delay in that area or related to autism but he is being assessed for both. He really struggles with his emotions and controlling his impulses. We think he "masks" because he is impeccably behaved at nursery and then really struggles when he's back at home. Afternoons are the hardest for him, particularly as he's getting tired, and he can throw, hit, shout and struggle to cope with anything that isn't focused on him. He gets upset at us having conversations or touching his things/not doing things his way. He's much more affectionate nowadays than he used to be and loves a good cuddle. He often asks to sit on my knee and recently he's been going to sleep with my jumper. He's so sweet and can be incredibly caring, a very sensitive little soul and he's growing emotionally every day.
He still has very little pretend play; today the SALT asked if he could make food or a drink in his toy kitchen and he said he couldn't because he didn't have any real food or drinks. He takes things very literally - yesterday I said he was like a cuddly teddy bear in his dressing gown and and his response was, "I are but it's just Oscar in a dressing gown".
Health
His health is okay although we do still wonder if he has allergies as he seems congested a lot of the time and we give him Piriton on occasion if he's had a few nights of waking up snotty. We have wondered if he still has reflux or some sort of issue because he often seems to cough and splutter when he drinks. I mentioned it to the SALT when we arranged the appointment and she has passed it on to the Eating & Drinking Team to see him. His weight has been a bit up and down but he's grown in height and doesn't look underweight so we are just keeping an eye on it.
Eating
Eating continues to go up and down. When he started back at nursery in August he ate more there - fish fingers, pasta, cheese, beans, sausages, mashed potato and fruit. He hasn't really shown that interest at home except for a little mashed potato and nursery are still concerned that he doesn't eat much there although, as he only does mornings, it isn't really a huge issue. He has become pretty obsessed with cheese which is costing us a fortunate but at least he's getting some protein and calcium in. He still eats popcorn chicken, garlic bread, rice/cous cous and bread/toast and loves cereal. Anything else is hit and miss other than chocolate biscuits/cake and he rarely touches fruits or vegetables, although he did go through a bit of a grape-loving phase for a couple of weeks. EDIT (5/11/20): Last night he ate chicken and mashed potato!
Sleep
The big news here is that we've dropped the nap in the last ten days and it seems to be going alright. It's taken him a little while to adjust from early wake-ups since the clock change which fell on the first day we dropped his nap (poor planning on our part) but he's generally sleeping until at least 6 and then I pop something on my phone for him and try to snooze until about 7. We did go through a phase where I rarely ended up in his bed, or at least not before 4-5 AM then he started waking earlier in the evenings and once I got him back to sleep it was hard to sneak away because he was in a lighter sleep, hence dropping the nap. It has been hard work and he's struggling from about 3 PM until dinner time because he's exhausted but we will see how it goes over the next few weeks. He's struggling with congestion so I'm waiting to speak to the GP tomorrow about a better, longer-acting antihistamine than Piriton so maybe his sleep will be more restful.
Nursery
He settled back into nursery after lockdown like a dream. The first day he was so excited to go back he ran in without a second thought. We had a couple of days where he was a bit upset after that but then he's been fine since and he's recently moving into the pre-school room where he's really thriving. It definitely had an impact on his eating and has helped his social skills too, apparently he is starting to form friendships with a little boy called Ronnie and he keeps mentioning a girl called Edith. We are hoping to increase him to five mornings from January as he should get 30 hours free. It will increase our costs a little as we have to cover 30 hours in holidays instead of the 15 we pay now but it will be worth it for him to have that consistency. We did have a brief parents evening via Zoom but Oscat wouldn't really let us chat. Their only concern was his eating really and they said they were really happy with his his speech had come along.
Likes and Dislikes
He loves snuggling up with his Shadow shark in bed and sometimes my jumper. He also sometimes cuddles his Rex dinosaur that my friends bought him for his first birthday. He still loves books, currently Superworm, Highway Rat and his Peppa Pig anthology. TV wise his favourite things are Messy Goes to Okido (which is really quite educational), Chico Bon Bon, Paw Patrol and Super Monsters at the moment. He still mostly thrives on filling and emptying activities hence loving his new bin lorry and he loves playing in water, although baths are hit and miss. Swimming isn't great at the moment but better than it was pre-lockdown and he actually got in the water for the first time without any coaxing. He can just about swim with two short woggles but hates getting his face near the water so we are going to get him a goggle mask for when we go back in December. He's loved exploring and collecting leaves and acorns over the past few months until the weather got rubbish and the nights got dark. In the summer he loves blackberry picking and he's found a real love of baking (mostly just eating the goodies). He still likes throwing and nowadays he often spins or jumps up and down when he's excited or overwhelmed.
He dislikes a lot of noise and really struggles with us talking to each other although we aren't sure if that's because he's not the focus of attention as he doesn't like us hugging either. He hates it if you start singing and still isn't a huge fan of the car although he does tolerate it nowadays. He doesn't like labels in his clothes or being told what to do in any capacity. He hates coats and hats but does tolerate them if essential. He knows what he likes and what he wants but there's not much he outright hates.
Autism?
We had our Community Paediatrician assessment over the phone as I detailed in a previous post and are in the middle of his SALT assessment. We shall wait and see but I would expect her might not get a diagnosis as his issues aren't interfering with his daily life enough.
